That he also bequeathed his name to the city's airport shows that whatever Liverpool lacks in political or economic significance, it makes up for culturally.Lennon did not, however, provide my favourite example of a Liverpool musician's wit. Years ago, the Queen visited the city, arriving at Lime Street on the royal train. During her visit she was introduced to local celebrities, including Gerry and the Pacemakers. She expressed a (doubtless insincere) desire to hear them play, so Gerry Marsden invited her to a gig that very night at the Liverpool Empire Her Majesty smiled sweetly "I'm so sorry," she said. "My train has to leave at six o'clock."One of the Pacemakers leant forward "That's all right, love," he said. "You can always catch the 10 past 11."You can't get away from humour in an essay about Liverpool - but then you can't get away from it in Liverpool And on the football terraces, of course, it is rampant.
It's why Peaches Geldof - a Chelsea girl through and through - has already become the voice of her generation, at the precocious age of 16.It also why Jose Mourinho, Chelsea FC's iconoclastic Portuguese coach, isn't just tolerated, as he may have been elsewhere, but adored. His ego and tantrums make him an irresistibly colourful part of the most vivid tapestry in the country.So my final message to the thousands of Scousers who will descend on our neighbourhood this evening is this. As far as I'm concerned, you can loathe Chelsea all you like. I love it - and I've got a funny feeling that a few of your team tonight will find it agreeable enough to start thinking about moving down here.Painters, politicians and punk rock* Kensington was given the status of a royal borough by Edward VII, and it was joined with Chelsea in 1965* Sites of interest in Chelsea include the 17th-century Physic Garden and Thomas Carlyle's house at 24 Cheyne Row* The average house price in Kensington and Chelsea is £649,409. Average household income is £31,408* Kensington and Chelsea's electoral candidates are Catherine Atkinson, Labour; Jennifer Kingsley, Liberal Democrats; and Malcom Rifkind, the former Conservative foreign secretary. Michael Portillo, who is standing down, won for the Tory stronghold in 2001 with a majority of 8,771* Chelsea FC, founded 1915 (and formerly known as the Pensioners), have been League champions once, won three FA Cups, two League Cups and five European cups* The old "Shed" end was once home to some of the nastiest fans in the country. That said, you could cheerfully leave out the Beatles and still write a decent history of British pop music based purely on Liverpool bands, from the Fourmost and Scaffold to the Coral and the Zutons, by way of Frankie Goes To Hollywood, the Teardrop Explodes and Orchestral Manoeuvres in The Dark And let's not forget Ken Dodd singing "Tears".
Another Liverpool nightclub, Cream, later spearheaded Britain's dance movement.But plainly, any appreciation of Liverpool as a cultural force has to begin with John Lennon, Paul McCartney, George Harrison and Ringo Starr. But, says Brian Viner, it's the Scouse wit that is keyThe people of Liverpool have been profoundly affected by the city's designation as European Capital of Culture 2008. A man I know who spent last Wednesday evening in a pub in Toxteth came out to find his car standing on four encyclopedias.OK, so that's a gag; but it's a gag doing the rounds not along Doughty Street, home of Merseyside's least-favourite magazine The Spectator - which accused Liverpudlians of wallowing in mawkish self-pity - but along the banks of the Mersey.It demonstrates Liverpool's capacity to laugh at itself. To laugh, moreover, at the biggest honour that the European Council of Ministers can bestow. Proud as Liverpudlians are with this accolade, they know they don't need it to prove the city's cultural worth. Indeed, if tonight's Champions' League clash between Chelsea and Liverpool were a match to decide cultural - rather than footballing - pre-eminence, it would be no contest.After all, Chelsea might be synonymous with glamour, but Liverpool is synonymous with things that matter infinitely more in life: community spirit, warmth, wit, chip butties and great music.Even in the 1960s, when the King's Road staked a reputation as Britain's grooviest thoroughfare, everyone knew the centre of the universe was Mathew Street, home of the Cavern Club, birthplace of the Beatles.
Other Cheyne Walk residents have included Elizabeth Gaskell (born at No 93), Joseph Mallord William Turner (died at No 119), and David Lloyd George who lived, appropriately, at No 10* The Chelsea Arts Club was founded at the suggestion of Whistler in 1891The Capital of Culture 2008 is miles in front. As ticket prices soar, Stamford Bridge has seen increasing numbers of the local moneyed classes coming through its turnstiles to watch the "Chelski" revolution under new Russian owner Roman Abramovich* Famous fans include Sebastian Coe, John Major, David Mellor and Alec Stewart* Chelsea was the home of the painter James McNeil Whistler, who lived in Cheyne Walk. It may surprise some, but down here you are judged on who you are, not on where you came from.The second night after I moved to Chelsea, I ended up playing pool alongside Hugh Grant in the bar above the Goat in Boots on Fulham Road. The following evening, I happened by the Phene Arms, just off Oakley Street, and found myself propping up the bar next to George Best (though by this stage of proceedings, the bar was probably propping up George, rather than vice versa).This easygoing attitude comes from the fact that no matter how rich or famous you are, there's probably someone even richer and more famous a few yards away. Putting on attitude of the kind displayed by rich types in provincial towns will generally elicit only a raised eyebrow and a turned back on the King's Road.Foreign footballers have long understood the lifestyle benefits of living among their neighbours in Chelsea, rather than in gated compounds in the North-west.