Gene Pitney? That seems, in many ways, the most uncanny of all. You, for your part, might be reminded of a saying that was old when Judas was a lad: "If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans". I myself am reminded of a strangely familiar wish-fulfilment system operated by Judas's new best friend, although I don't remember any anti-nagging stipulations: The Cosmos seems a bit of a grump I expect it's the constant banging and explosions. No, nothing about blowing out candles and not telling anybody, or a dusty lamp It worked for Noel, though. You might want to test it by ordering success as a daytime TV quiz show host, too Now, then, remember, please, no negatives. His return to success and celebrity is, apparently, due to a new-age belief called The Cosmic Ordering Service, run by Barbel Mohr, "a Munich guru", who claims that you can get what you want simply by ordering "The Cosmos " to come up with it, providing you don't ask for any negatives, you don't obsess about it after ordering, and you never repeat an order Well. (Memo to Dan Brown: did you know that nobody seems to know anything about James the Lesser? And that Canterbury used to own Bartholomew's arm? No, please, have it for free.) Elsewhere, we are being told about a couple of Aramaic affidavits in which Jesus denied he was God; and that, at the Sea of Galilee, he was really walking on thin ice Deep waters: something Noel Edmonds knows all about.

And what might it mean for St Matthias, who, in the traditional version, took Judas's place as an apostle? Relegation? Much, I should have said, for the congregation of the Saint Matthias the Apostle Church in Magnolia, Texas, to ponder on, if only in terms of a new sign board. Will the bloke who took his name in vain to insult the electric Bob Dylan now have to apologise? What about all the art? Who will be the first to call their child after him? It's going to take time to get used to that being shouted across the supermarket. What concerns me are the implications if he is cleared, as we have lost far too many villains already to modern sympathy and understanding, and, until this, Judas seemed the genuine 30-piece solid silver yardstick. (Keen political observers will observe uncanny parallels over here.) Still, I am not remotely qualified to comment on doctrinal matters, save to say that these seem matters mostly concerning the relative amount of free will available to poor Judas. Distracted by the current mood of pervasive crisis - even Sir Cliff Richard is emigrating - I have nevertheless noticed quite a lot of activity in the world of metaphysics and theology, much of it to do with Judas, Noel Edmonds and Gene Pitney. Although strict chronology is not especially relevant in this context, let us begin with Judas, revealed by a newly translated ancient Coptic manuscript as the favourite apostle who was only following Christ's orders to betray him. Much agonised exegesis has ensued, mostly in America, where the useful distinction between fact and faith never quite gets the attention it deserves in any number of areas, including the White House.

Then there is the priming of the pumps of US public opinion for the war option - witness the now routine comparisons made between Iran's leader, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, and Saddam Hussein, or even Hitler.. First, there is the continual drip of leaked reports from within the administration to that effect. Some may dismiss the reports as hyperbole, but there are plenty of indicators that the Bush administration is stepping up plans for air strikes on Iran and pursuing the option of regime change as a way out of a combination of domestic and foreign difficulties. So says Seymour Hersh in The New Yorker, claiming that Mr Bush is contemplating "bunker-busting" nuclear strikes on Iran's nuclear enrichment and processing facilities at Natanz and Isfahan. Beware an American president at bay. Haunted by tumbling poll ratings and the chaos of post-war Iraq, the eye of George Bush is fixing on Iran's nuclear plans.

Ministers have not faced the equivalent of the Tories' Black Wednesday moment in 1992, when public trust in the Government's basic management skills virtually disintegrated overnight.. But for the moment the public still sees Labour as a fairly competent team. That may change if, as seems likely, the high-street recession gets worse, and jobs begin to disappear in large numbers. No wonder we can hear the sound of knives being sharpened in corners, as party grandees' talk of "concern" with Mr Cameron's performance fills the air. Mr Cameron's great problem is that the public's disillusion with Tony Blair has yet to rub off on the Government as a whole. After an initial surge in support, the party is again flat-lining in the polls, sometimes running neck and neck with Labour on around 35 per cent but never advancing into a big lead.